If I could have my wasted days back...

I was thinking while I was talking to Lea and I thought of a Metallica line from a song "If I could have my wasted days I would use them to get my life back on track." well I thought about and I looked back on my life and saw I wasted FOUR years of my life. I was really depressed for four years I had one friend and the rest of the world hated me. If anyone asks why here's your answer: I DON'T KNOW!!! The no one every loved me. I hated it. My parents just never bothered because they thought I was just acting like a normal teen. Well I am finally happy and they apparently don't care. I just want to fall off a large cliff and think about no one loves me and how I wasted my life. then to land perfectly fine. i don't want to die yet. i just want to fall. the feeling of wind flowing through my hair. I find peace when i fall. I love to fly but I'm human. oh well there is always sky diving. I'm listening to Metallica right now and the song fits how i feel. Its the song "Until it sleeps." the beginning lyrics are "Where do i take this pain of mine? I'd run but it stays right by my side. so tare me open pull me out. The things inside me scream and shout. and the pain still hates me, so hold me until it sleeps..." There is only one cure. i could let you guess but i feel generous. The cure is being with Lea. Why? She makes me forget. she makes the pain go away. it fades and doesn't come back till we separate. i wish every bad thing that ever happened to not have. but life is chalked full of pain. one has to deal with it. well enough of my problems others have dealt with worse. no use in my complaining.

Your master has spoken...
-ZCF